This Is Your Life... Or Is It?

Shortly after losing my bid for the U.S. House of Representatives in 2008, the county GOP chairman asked me if I would consider running for town council in Barrington, a small community of roughly 7,000 residents living within its 1.5 square mile borders. His thoughts were that I could start building my political portfolio one step at a time to prepare for a future run for higher office down the road.

I politely declined.

Reason #1 was I had just battled hard to earn more than 90,000 Republican and independent votes in one of the safest Democratic districts in the country, a district in which a Republican congressman hadn’t been elected since 1972. That vote total was the highest in 35 years, but still more than 100,000 shy of my opponent, a 9-term incumbent. And so, after pounding the pavement for 10 months and knocking on 10,000 doors, I needed a break.

Reason #2 was that the issues that motivated me then – and still do today – were state and national concerns. To be honest, it didn’t matter to me whether there was a traffic light installed at the corner of Clements Bridge Road and E. Atlantic Avenue or at the intersection of Clements Bridge Road and Shreve Avenue. Ask the neighbors, take a poll, or simply flip a coin… I really don’t care.

Actually, I do care, but it’s just not a hill that I’m willing to die on.

However, I will gladly lay down my life to protect the life of a precious preborn baby… or to defend our religious liberties as outlined in the First Amendment or our right to bear arms as enumerated in the Second.

And so, that got me thinking...

If potholes and streetlights aren’t my cup of tea, what “big picture” issues really float my boat? And, to take it a step farther, based on those big picture issues, what era in American history – other than the present – would I have most enjoyed living in?

Here are a few possibilities… and if you are a history buff like me, I suggest you engage in the exercise yourself.

The American Revolutionary Era – At first glance, this would seem a natural fit because the cause of liberty would motivate me to take up arms in a heartbeat. I hate bullies and in the middle to late 1700’s, there was no bigger tyrant than King George III.

I could see myself serving as an aide-de-camp to Gen. Washington… or as a speechwriter for Patrick Henry… or as an intern to Thomas Jefferson. Heck, I would have gladly shined any of their buckled shoes or trimmed their tri-cornered hats just to be in their presence and listen to them debate the grand and glorious issues of the day.

My only concern with living in the late 18th century would have been the lack of personal hygiene and the absence of indoor plumbing. I shower every morning and can’t imagine making the long trek to the privy, especially in the long, cold winter months. Not having a reliable and sanitary food and water supply might also prove to be a dealbreaker (I realize I sound like a real softie).

The Civil War Era – Now that I have lived below the Mason-Dixon Line for the past 14 years, I guess I should refer to it as the War Between the States or better yet, as the War of Northern Aggression. However, despite the supposed romance of the antebellum South, I find the concept of one human being owning another human being morally repugnant. And so, instead of being a Johnny Reb, yours truly would have been fighting for the Army of the Potomac to free the slaves and preserve the Union.

Whereas I admire Robert E. Lee as a man of honor and integrity, I think he was wrong to fight for a cause so doomed and so reprehensible. Likewise, I hold the Great Emancipator in high esteem and wonder how quickly the wounds of war would have healed had he not been assassinated. Sadly, we will never know.

Alas, still no showers and still no indoor plumbing unless you were extremely wealthy, so I may have to pass once again.

The Industrial Age – Steamboats, locomotives, the telegraph, and electricity revolutionized life in America during this turbulent period. Industrial giants such as John D. Rockefeller, J.P. Morgan, Cornelius Vanderbilt, and Andrew Carnegie arrived on the scene and soon dominated America’s economy, amassing incredible fortunes along the way. Meanwhile, Thomas Edison, Samuel Morse, and Alexander Graham Bell were seemingly dreaming up new inventions every day.

Mark Twain was entertaining the masses in print while Buffalo Bill Cody was doing likewise with his traveling Wild West shows. Wyatt Earp and Bat Masterton were household names and frontier towns like Deadwood, Tombstone, and Dodge City captured the imaginations of young boys everywhere.

Spiritually speaking, giants like D.L. Moody in America and Charles Spurgeon in England were drawing huge crowds to hear the gospel preached powerfully and unapologetically.

Still, the Victorian influence from “across the pond” reinforced the societal status quo and stymied some of the intellectual debates seen in other eras, so we’ll let this one slide.

The Progressive Era – Teddy Roosevelt was my kind of guy. Full of energy and exuberance… and whenever life kicked him in the teeth, such as when his first wife and his mother both died on the same day, he found a way to bounce back stronger than ever. Forget about Bill Clinton; T.R. was the real “Comeback Kid”.

I love the way that Roosevelt took the bull (or the bull moose) by the horns when it came to the Panama Canal, busting trade monopolies, or charging up San Juan Hill. Bully for him!

I’m starting to think that this might be just the right time for Dale Glading to make his debut, especially since I love the “deadball era” of baseball that featured such luminaries as Ty Cobb, Christy Mathewson, Walter Johnson, and Honus Wagner.

But then again…

The Roaring Twenties – How can you not want to live during the Golden Age of Sports when Babe Ruth, Red Grange, Bobby Jones, Jack Dempsey, and Bill Tilden dominated the scene? “Cool Cal” Coolidge was in the White House, you could buy a Model T Ford for just $260 (down from $825 in 1908), and “Lucky Lindy” had just crossed the Atlantic in the Spirit of St. Louis. The Charleston was all the rage and Scott Joplin’s ragtime tunes were the hottest ticket in town.

But there were no really pressing social issues for someone like me to sink his teeth into other than the Scopes Monkey Trial in 1925, so the jury is still out on this decade and the next.

The Greatest Generation – Why not, right? Defeat Nazi Germany and Fascist Italy with one hand and Imperial Japan with the other. Come home a war hero and trade your uniform for a tux so you can marry your high school sweetheart, go to college on the G.I. Bill, and buy a home in the suburbs. Life is good… at least until the Soviet Union decides they want to enter the atomic age, too.

That being said, I would give my eye teeth to see Ted Williams, Joe DiMaggio, and Stan Musial in their primes… not to mention Ben Hogan, Byron Nelson, and Sam Snead battle it out on the golf links.

The Fabulous 50s (and the Cold War) – Let’s just call it the Eisenhower Era since Ike was president from January 1953 to January 1961. Enter (and exit) Joe McCarthy and bid a fond farewell to Gen. Douglas MacArthur, who was unceremoniously relieved of duty by President Harry Truman for insubordination. No other decade seemingly offered a clearer distinction between good and evil than the 1950s with the great battle lines being drawn between the U.S. and the Soviet Union.

The Space Race is on… with America trailing badly. A hillbilly from Tupelo, Mississippi is introducing a new brand of music called rock ‘n roll to the nation’s youth, worrying parents and angering pastors. Still, life is good as the middle class is expanding, and the American Dream of home ownership and upward mobility is becoming more and more attainable.

But to me, the biggest attractions of the 1950s are the burgeoning Civil Rights movement, Frank Sinatra at the peak of his vocal powers, and the tandem of Mickey Mantle, Willie Mays, and Duke Snider patrolling center field at Yankee Stadium, the Polo Grounds, and Ebbets Field, respectively. Meanwhile, a charismatic young man with forearms like Popeye's and hailing from Latrobe PA is taking the PGA Tour by storm, forming Arnie's Army in the process.

Sign me up for either the Progressive Era or the Fabulous 50s and I'd be happy as a clam!