Turn Off the Spigot

When it comes to home repairs, I am one of the world’s least handy men. I guess I inherited that trait from my dad, who was equally inept at fixing things around the house. Instead, whenever something broke, he simply called the plumber, the electrician, or the carpenter. He was the same way when it came to car repairs.

However, even a not-so-handy guy like me knows that when the pipes start leaking, the first thing you do is turn off the water. Not just at the sink or the toilet, but at the main valve to the house if the leak persists.

Well, I use that illustration to make the following point: Uncle Sam has sprung a leak. It started out as a small drip, drip, drip, but it has since turned into a geyser the size of Yellowstone’s Old Faithful. And just like Old Faithful spews between 3,700 and 8,400 gallons of boiling water more than 100 feet into the air every 92 minutes, Uncle Sam spews taxpayers’ dollars at a record pace, spending $16.9 billion per day and adding $70,500 new debt each second to the already record $38.4 trillion federal debt.

That comes out to $112.500 in federal debt for every American man, woman, and child.

As far as the almost $7 trillion that Uncle Sam spends each year, 61% of that is designated as mandatory spending for programs such as Social Security (22%) and Medicare (14%). Next in line is discretionary spending at 28%, which includes defense and veterans’ benefits. The remaining 19% goes for servicing our national debt.

That’s right, folks. For the first time in American history, we now spend more money in interest payments on our national debt than we do to protect our country.

So, here’s my suggestion. TURN OFF THE SPIGOT!!!

America doesn’t just have a small leak in our kitchen sink. On the contrary, our main water line has broken and has flooded our entire basement. Our foundation is eroding and the water is rising up the cellar steps and will soon engulf the entire first floor.

We can either form a bucket brigade in a futile attempt to bail us out or reach for the valve that turns off the water completely. I opt for Option #2… and here’s how we do it.

First, hire a small army of forensic accountants to review the records of every Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid recipient, making sure that no Civil War veterans are still cashing checks. Think I’m kidding? You’d be amazed at the amount of fraud and waste that takes place at the Social Security Administration (SSA) and the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS).

Once that’s done, keep raising the retirement age to receive full benefits incrementally because seniors are living longer and couples are having fewer babies, meaning there are less workers per recipient than ever before. For instance, when Social Security was enacted in 1935, the average life expectancy for an American male was 59 years and the worker to recipient ratio was 16:1. Today, American men can expect to live to be 77 and the worker to recipient ratio is 2.5 to 1. That is unsustainable.

Second, reduce Medicaid benefits for people earning above the federal poverty level as well as for adults who have been on the rolls for more than two years (five years for minor children). Currently, the cutoff is 138% of the federal poverty level and benefits can be renewed annually and indefinitely.

Limiting such benefits may sound cruel, but I think creating a permanently dependent underclass is even crueler. History teaches us that as long as there is free bread, people will line up to eat it.

Third, trim every area of discretionary spending to the bone and gut the ones that have the most fat. I am a staunch advocate of a strong national defense, but I am sure that there are savings to be had in the War Department, too, as outdated weapon systems are discarded, unnecessary troop deployments are brought back home, and every defense contract that is awarded is gone over with a fine-tooth comb.

There are 15 different departments in the executive branch of the federal government and each of them has countless agencies under its jurisdiction. Do we really need an African Development Fund, an Agency for Global Media, an Agricultural Marketing Service (and an Agriculture Library), an Animal and Plant Health Inspection Service, or an Appalachian Regional Commission… and what exactly do those agencies do?

And that’s just the A’s. Don’t get me started on the Barry M. Goldwater Scholarship and Excellence in Education Foundation and the rest of the B’s.

Years ago, our family attended a rather large church that seemingly had more committees than people. Only half-kiddingly, I suggested to the pastor that he shut down every committee for one year except one: the “People Are Dying and Going to Hell, What Are We Doing About It?” Committee. That would allow the church to refocus its attention and energies on what really mattered… and after a year, any of the previously shuttered committees that were essential would naturally re-establish themselves. The others would simply stay forever dormant.

Why not try that same approach with some of these nonsensical government agencies that are part of our bloated federal bureaucracy? Shut them down for a year and see what happens. If the sky falls in, bring them back to life. If not, chalk it up to the fact that they were never needed in the first place.

One final thought…

How about turning off the spigot as far as legislation is concerned? I have no idea how many federal laws are currently on the books, let alone how many new ones are added each year. I suggest a one-year moratorium on all new legislation while we try to enforce the laws we already have. Meanwhile, let’s get rid of the ones that are obsolete and outdated… which I’m guessing are at least half of them.

So, who’s with me? You'd better decide fast, because the water is now waist-deep on the first floor... and we live in a one-story house.